


Human Resources

by CKM_Writes



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 11:29:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18010097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CKM_Writes/pseuds/CKM_Writes
Summary: Aubrey works in Human Resources and she has a “challenging” employee.





	Human Resources

**Author's Note:**

> This is a crack work of fiction. Don’t try this at home.

“So, I have this woman...” Aubrey started.

 

Chloe whooped. “You go Bree!”

 

Aubrey sighed and shook her head.“There is this woman at work who is driving me up the wall!”

 

Chloe smirked.“Ooh, sounds...”

 

“Chloe!” Aubrey scolded.She should really know better than to start a serious discussion with her friends after the third drink.

 

“Sowwy,” Chloe's puppy dog pout would normally be irresistible, but at the moment it was bordering on irritating.

 

Beca held back a laugh long enough to say, “You know your best friend doesn’t handle her liquor very well.”

 

“Well maybe her ‘girlfriend’ could encourage her to slow down long enough to listen to my freakin story!”

 

Beca ignored the obvious barb and nudged Chloe.“Dude!She said ‘freakin’, Chlo, I think she’s serious.”

 

Chloe giggled, but took a breath.“Sorry. Sorry. Putting on my serious face. This bitch at work.I’m listening.”

 

Aubrey rolled her eyes “I didn’t say she was a bitch. She’s just... frustrating.”

 

Beca snorted.

 

Chloe elbowed Beca. “Okay, so what did the not-bitch do?”

 

Aubrey glared at Beca but continued.“My company implemented this workplace relationship acknowledgement form last year.Every Friday since, she shows up at my office. Most of the time with a new form for a new partner. Sometimes to ask questions.”

 

“So you're mad because she's a ho?”

 

Chloe gasped. “Beca!” Aubrey smirked when Chloe smacked her really close not-girlfriend or whatever.

 

“What?” Beca shrugged.“I'm just saying.”

 

Aubrey shook her head. “I'm in HR, I can't do my job well if I judge people. She's just exhausting!Do you know for the past three months she's still shown up at the end of the day, every Friday, even without a new form…”

 

“Probably no one lef… ow dammit Chlo!”

 

“She has managed to come up with these obscure questions. Half of the time I don't even know the answers off the top of my head and I have to look them up so she'll just sit there waiting, no matter how long it takes.”

 

“Is she hot?” Chloe asks with a completely straight face that throws Aubrey for a loop.

 

“She's… I guess she's very attractive. What does… why do you ask?” Aubrey smirked.“Should Beca be worried.”

 

Beca rolled her eyes. “Whatever dude!”But Aubrey did not miss Beca’s concerned glance at Chloe.

 

“Not for me, silly! I think she's digging you.”

 

****

 

Aubrey spent the work week trying to get the conversation out of her mind. It was simply ridiculous. Stacie Conrad might be … friendly with a number of Bardcorps employees, (apparently, both male and female, according to the forms), but didn't mean she was interested in Aubrey.

 

Aubrey caught herself staring a few moments too long when she passed Stacie in the hallways.Nope. Not doing this. Not getting fired. Or worse, setting a bad example.So, she spent the rest of the week holed up in her office.

 

Sure enough, Friday afternoon rolled around and Aubrey heard a knock on the door.She told them to come in and, of course, it was Stacie Conrad.

 

“Were you checking out my goodies, this week?”

 

Aubrey blustered.“No, I. I mean, um, I apologize if I offended you. If you want to file a complaint I will have to pass it on to…”

 

Stacie cut her off with a kiss. “I wasn't complaining.”

 

“Oh, um. Wow. I'm sorry um… in my position. I can't. The form won't cover…”

 

Stacie smiled and nodded.“Here's my resignation letter, I had it notorized three weeks ago.No implications for you.”

 

“I… are you really sure this is what you want?”What are you even supposed to do in this situation? Aubrey couldn't remember them covering this type of thing in her classes.

 

“Let me put it this way,” Stacie said, letting her summer dress fall down over her shoulders to the ground, nothing underneath.“Whoops. I'm in violation of the dress code.”

 

“You are so fired. I mean your resignation is accepted.I um… would you mind putting your clothes on so I can open the door?”

 

“No problem,” Stacie said sweetly as she deftly slipped back into her dress.“My address is on file. Come by around seven. And… bring your appetite.

 


End file.
